OK fine

In meditation class the other day my brain was swirling. Cycling through loads of BS. I eventually woke up, realizing I was trapped in these wack thoughts instead of listening to a bunch of birds and meditating. I said “OK fine”—out loud, I think. This is what’s going on in my head? “OK fine.” Do you, brain!

Acknowledging and naming these thoughts made it all way less heavy. It put me in more control. Not of my thoughts but of my reaction and their eventual shift. I was less bummed at myself for thinking of the BS we could spend all-day-everyday clouded by. I was able to witness my thoughts. To notice and eventually laugh at them.

Weird I wasn’t present with the beautiful day and birds but, “OK fine.” I was able to let myself off the hook. There was nothing wrong with these thoughts. It was, and is, so often all in the reaction to them.

“OK fine” is my release valve from all this pressure. I say it in the tone of talking to a friend doing something you don’t recommend or something you want to give them a little crap for. You’re gonna do that? Alright… I say it in that tone we use to make things inherently a question. One that requires some reaction, if even an eye roll.

I can sit there and laugh at these wack thoughts, even the really tough ones. I can question them, I can wonder why my brain’s going that way, and I can even clown myself a bit for being so far from the moment.

In Bird by Bird, Anne Lamott shares a quote from her friend that she says changed her “Permanently.” She was trying on a dress to wear to a date that night and asked her friend if it, “Made her hips look big.” Her friend replied, “Annie? I really don’t think you have that kind of time.”

Do we have time to dwell on wack BS that’s not serving us or our crew? Why would we take any time away from having fun and being 100% us?

I know I’ll forget this in about 5-minutes. That’s why hype living is a practice. It takes hard work in this royally f’d up world to be the Fun Professionals we know we’re capable of. It takes discipline and reminders and all the little tricks we make up for ourselves to survive and thrive.

What’s your “OK fine?”

CREWLOVE

Originality (camp)

“Originality rises from your underground truth. When you have a passion of the truth about yourself, originality will percolate up through your work. When you go for the truth, originality takes care of itself.”

— W.A. Mathieu, The Listening Book

first☮️

What do we feel when we open our eyes?

Full moon in the backyard. Sun rising over mountains out front.

A reflection of what’s inside.

Fam. Crew. Self.

When I’m stressing deadlines—rushed, already behind.

When I’m doing me, the reflection is bliss.